I had a long phone conversation tonight with a friend who recently moved to Portland after finishing medical school in DC. Talking to her (even though I was very glad to) made me a little sad, and I can't put my finger on why... something to do with distance, I guess, and friendship, and what happens when vague possibilities become realities or (in my own case) start to look increasingly like they're not. The feeling of being left behind, and, conversely, leaving something you weren't ready to give up. Relief and disappointment in both cases.

I also watched "The Anniversary Party" tonight. I had high hopes because I so loved Jennifer Jason Leigh in "Proof," and I thought I liked Alan Cumming, too, but maybe they should forget about this writing/directing stuff and stick to acting. They produced one of those movies that makes you want to turn your face away because it's so painful and awkward, but doesn't leave you with a damn thing. Hollywood people shouldn't be allowed to make movies about themselves, it just winds up self-serving and gross and false.

It's raining this pure spring rain outside my open window right now -- blowing fast with big, loud spatters and then receding slowly to a wet silence, gusting up again with double the force, falling back with a tinny shatter of sharp drops against the walls and glass.